Sunday, January 11, 2015

Passive Aggressive Deckhand

Engineer:  So why did you move my book?

Deckhand: I was tidying up.  I like to keep busy.

E: You moved it so far away, I thought it was lost.

D: Ah.  Sorry.  It's the way I do things.

E: Yeah, I've seen the way you do things.  It's driving me nuts. 

D: What?

E: I eat a hot dog from the leftovers, you throw them away.

D: I was cleaning out the reefer.

E: I eat some roast beef out of a new package and you throw it away.

D: It was bad.

E: But you save the slimy green turkey.

D: The mate likes turkey.

E: Fuck the fridge. What about my clothes? You move my laundry to the washer, put three dryer sheets in with it, and you didn't even have laundry to follow mine.

D: I thought I was being nice.

E: You're not nice.  Ever.  So what's with the good deeds.

The deckhand sat in the corner of the settee, folded up at the back and knees in a compact pile, staring at the television, but every now and then, he took a furtive glance at the engineer.  This could get interesting.

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